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    Getting Even

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    CW
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    Getting Even

    Post  CW on Wed Jan 18, 2012 4:42 pm

    Ever feel like getting even with someone who has mistreated you?
    Last Friday the 13th, was a good day for me until I ran into my daughter's boyfriends mother at the grocery store. She decided she wanted to discuss a private matter in public while I was waiting in line to pay for my grocery items. I told her now is not the time for this conversation. She has my phone number, I asked her to call me. But she insisted on finding others to agree with feelings. Needless to say I didn't agree with her views. Therefore I asked her once again to call me at home. The topic was her son and daughter (both 21) are spending nights together and she feels this is wrong. They should be married and they both are doing wrong in the sight of God.
    All of this talk was making me very angry as she continued on until others begin the nod their head in agreement with her. I finally said before I walked away "I don't care if the entire planet earth agree with you, I don't and I mean it!" I was so angry at this point I just could not wait to get even with her for what she did to me. I wanted to show her just how it feels to have your business put on blast in public. I gave her a good taste of her own medicine early...... Saturday morning. I regret disturbing her neighbors but it sure felt good getting even with her. I was just the one to teach her to "take care of your own business and leave others alone." Including your son and my daughter and especially when you want to involve me.

    I fixed her, and I fixed her good. Sometimes its just hard letting go and some people just need to be taught a lesson.

    Love to all.....
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    SpiritVoices
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    Re: Getting Even

    Post  SpiritVoices on Wed Jan 18, 2012 6:48 pm

    You're not on your own,CW.
    I should imagine that most people feel the same way.
    I used to be the same as you,couln't wait to get revenge and used to let my temper fly.

    I have learned since then,that patience and holding back gives more satisfaction than blowing one's top.
    I am not critising you,I know exactly what your feelings are.
    Over the last few months,I have had problems with someone who used to be a good friend. I wanted to murder them,honestly! :blush:
    I have now learned to keep silent,to let them do their worst.
    I reply in a decent kind of way,appealing to their sanity and good will to let bygones be bygones.
    If they don't like it,they can lump it,I now walk away.
    :hugz:
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    Violet
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    Re: Getting Even

    Post  Violet on Wed Jan 18, 2012 9:00 pm

    Oh yes I know exactly how you feel....and it has took immeasurable restraint to hold back, I honestly didn't believe I had such strength but what I stand to lose if I act far outweighs the satifaction of a few moments of getting even, life I think will eventually balance this one out, i've seen it happen before and it will happen again.



    The topic was her son and daughter (both 21) are spending nights together and she feels this is wrong. They should be married and they both are doing wrong in the sight of God.
    All of this talk was making me very angry as she continued on until others begin the nod their head in agreement with her.



    They're old enough and they're both adults, I bet her son would be mortified to know she was discussing this in a supermarket queue, and i'm not surprised you got angry because that's your daughter too.



    Just when the caterpillar thought the world was over, it became a butterfly.
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    CW
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    Re: Getting Even

    Post  CW on Thu Jan 19, 2012 3:51 pm

    They're old enough and they're both adults, I bet her son would be
    mortified to know she was discussing this in a supermarket queue, and
    i'm not surprised you got angry because that's your daughter too.
    Violet some parents just don't know when to let go. I enjoy the time they come spend with me, as I'm alone right now. This is what she don't like. They both are in college, I look forward to opportunities to share with both of them. I trust that thy both are responsible young adults working towards an independent future for themselves. If she doesn't feel this way then don't push your negative opinions upon me or them for that matter.


    I have learned since then,that patience and holding back gives more satisfaction than blowing one's top.
    I am not critising you,I know exactly what your feelings are.
    Over the last few months,I have had problems with someone who used to be a good friend. I wanted to murder them,honestly!
    Thank you Joanie I don't feel you criticizing in any way besides I asked for it. I've always been the type person letting go is not easy for me. I could always (walk away, not voice my feelings, even let you push me around or just walk all over me) Not anymore! This has cause me many problems, True forgiveness is a feeling of satisfaction and relief. I was only pushing it further down inside me for a later time. Never really forgiving...Getting even is not always a good idea because it can sometime prolong the forgiving process.
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    SpiritVoices
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    Re: Getting Even

    Post  SpiritVoices on Thu Jan 19, 2012 4:21 pm

    My father once said to me quite proudly 'You're a battler',forgive when it is necessary and those who do not mean any harm with words'.

    'But battle those who are mean with intent with cruel words.'

    I've never forgotten that advice he gave to me.
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    skfarblum
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    Re: Getting Even

    Post  skfarblum on Thu Jan 19, 2012 5:47 pm

    There is to me,a certain zen or grace to living.It does not come
    often.When I am in it I am not aware of this gentle flow.I become
    aware of the fact only when I stop doing what I was doing, which
    allowed for this flow.
    I had this flow today in the midst of helping my grandchild.
    I assume all people find this happening to them,on occasions.
    It is to be treasured.
    Just a bit of an old man ramble.

    Stephen
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    SpiritVoices
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    Re: Getting Even

    Post  SpiritVoices on Thu Jan 19, 2012 7:55 pm

    A very graceful ramble,Stephen.

    Thoughts like that often grace the person who thinks them.
    :flo:
    Joanie
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    Beware_of_Italics
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    Re: Getting Even

    Post  Beware_of_Italics on Thu Jan 19, 2012 11:17 pm

    I agree, they're all adults and this mother just needs to see them as such. Adults make their own decisions, and she isn't always going to agree with her son's decisions. And CW, I respect you for standing up to her. Otherwise, I'd fear she'd continue to behave the same way. Some people have to be put in their place.

    As for getting even, I hear ya. Lately, it's my mother and I avoiding my uncle. (Mom's brother). She loaned him $1,000 for his divorce, which is technically Dad's money. (And here Dad was out of work 2 or 3 times so close to retirement). But it looks like my parents aren't going to get one cent back, as so far my uncle has spent $6,000 on a wedding ring, had a big wedding, went on 3 vacations, and is now buying a $1,000 dog which is going to be specially trained. My uncle owes a lot of people in this family money, and it's like he's gotten amnesia suddenly.

    Getting even... yep. Not gonna happen, but it sure would feel good. We can't force the man to do the right thing, so instead we call upon that good old "immeasureable restraint" Violet was talking about. Otherwise, we'd be all
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    skfarblum
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    Re: Getting Even

    Post  skfarblum on Fri Jan 20, 2012 4:33 am

    Dear Joan,
    Thank you.
    Stephen
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    Violet
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    Re: Getting Even

    Post  Violet on Sat Feb 11, 2012 12:27 am

    Beware_of_Italics wrote:I agree, they're all adults and this mother just needs to see them as such. Adults make their own decisions, and she isn't always going to agree with her son's decisions. And CW, I respect you for standing up to her. Otherwise, I'd fear she'd continue to behave the same way. Some people have to be put in their place.

    As for getting even, I hear ya. Lately, it's my mother and I avoiding my uncle. (Mom's brother). She loaned him $1,000 for his divorce, which is technically Dad's money. (And here Dad was out of work 2 or 3 times so close to retirement). But it looks like my parents aren't going to get one cent back, as so far my uncle has spent $6,000 on a wedding ring, had a big wedding, went on 3 vacations, and is now buying a $1,000 dog which is going to be specially trained. My uncle owes a lot of people in this family money, and it's like he's gotten amnesia suddenly.

    Getting even... yep. Not gonna happen, but it sure would feel good. We can't force the man to do the right thing, so instead we call upon that good old "immeasureable restraint" Violet was talking about. Otherwise, we'd be all



    It's funny how often family think it's perfectly acceptable to do such things because it's family, I hear no end of such things.



    Just when the caterpillar thought the world was over, it became a butterfly.
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    Violet
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    Re: Getting Even

    Post  Violet on Sat Feb 11, 2012 12:28 am

    I assume all people find this happening to them,on occasions.
    It is to be treasured.



    Oh yes it does happen and it is to be treasured, you're quite right.



    Just when the caterpillar thought the world was over, it became a butterfly.
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    Thunder Bow
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    Re: Getting Even

    Post  Thunder Bow on Tue Mar 17, 2015 5:52 pm

    She was provoking you, trying to get you mad at her, and it worked. She wants to feel bad, and needs you to re-enforce that feeling. Her game is called "Kick Me". You got hooked in to the game. Next time give the hook back to her, in a quiet way.

    Also "Kick Me" is an attention getting game, notice haw she trieed to get all the attention she could get. Children do this with their parents. She probably done this much when she was a child. You know how children do this to get attention, such as crying, or breaking some thing, having a nice tantrum.
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    SpiritVoices
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    Re: Getting Even

    Post  SpiritVoices on Tue Mar 17, 2015 6:47 pm

    skfarblum wrote:Dear Joan,
    Thank you.
    Stephen
    You have probally forgotten this site!       Long time,no see!   Hope all is well with you.....

    Joan xx

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